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Sunday, January 29, 2017

2017 Golden Globe Rant

74th GOLDEN GLOBES
SUNDAY, JANUARY 8, 2017
8:00 pm
HOST: JIMMY FALLON

8:00 pm: The opening song and dance number was very funny. Ryan Reynolds and Justin Timberlake are always good for a laugh.

I like Blake Lively's black and gold Versace dress but I could do without the pockets. 

Right off the bat the TelePrompTer isn't working and poor Jimmy has to wing it. 
Some Funny political jokes in the opening monologue.

8:10 pm: Emma Stone's Valentino v-cut nude star printed dress is gorgeous.  A great nod to her period piece "La La Land".

New comer Aaron Taylor-Johnson wins best supporting actor for Tom Ford's film "Nocturnal Animals ". Very handsome.

Michelle Williams' black and white Louis Vuitton lace dress is nice but take off the bow round her neck. Also her hair is too white. 

Hailee Steinfeld's purple Vera Wang dress is weird.  It's like she has curtains over her boobs. 

Love Ruth Negga's metallic Louis Vuitton dress.  It looks like armor from the future. 

Priyanka Chopra looks stunning in a low cut golden Ralph Lauren dress. Amazing with her skin and hair color.

8:15 pm: Billy Bob Thornton wins best actor in a drama series for "Goliath ". He's so skinny.

8:23 pm: Drew Barrymore's dress is very 1970ish, but most of her looks are a nod to hippies or peace or flower power. Looks like she has silver bird wings. Should have wore her hair up. 

Tracee Ellis Ross (Diana's daughter) wins best actress in a comedy series for "Blask-ish". Her Zuhair Murad dress is too tight and not very flattering, looks like a corset. She has a ring on every single finger. Bit much. Get rid of some rings in exchange for a pair of earrings.

8:26 pm: New series "Atlanta" wins best comedy. Director Donald Glover is wearing a cool brown  Gucci suede suit.

8:36 pm: Reese Witherspoon looks amazing as she always does in yellow. She's wearing Versace. I don't know what the hell Nicole Kidman is wearing. It's an Alexander McQueen disaster. It's like a teddy a prostitute from the Wild West would wear. Puffy sleeves and long mental nails on the cuffs. You look at these two on stage and it's like a before and after photo of a makeover show. 

Love Amy Adams' simple Tom Ford black sequin dress.  Don't usually see her in black. 

Sarah Paulson wins best actress in a mini series for "The People vs. O.J. Simpson ". Lovely gold Marc Jacobs dress. This show also wins best mini series.

8:46 pm: uuugg I wish Annette Benning's dress was black, red, gray. Anything but this terrible nude color. 

Why is Naomi Campbell even a presenter??? May I ask?? And Heidi Klum is beyond the help of a stylist. 

Hugh Laurie wins best supporting actor in a mini series for "The Night Manager ". He is always hilarious.

Sophia Vergara can do no wrong. She could have come out in a sleeping bag. She is wearing a sexy Zuhair Murad cut out gold dress. Of course her boobs look amazing. Annoying the jokes written for her are to make her seem like a bimbo. No jokes like that for the male actors. Sophia is presenting Sylvester Stallone's three daughters who are this year's Miss. Golden Globes

8:52 pm: Carrie Underwood's rose cut dress is horrifying. So many ruffles. 

9:02 pm: Michael Keaton presents for best supporting actress. Viola Davis wins for the Broadway adaptation "Fences". Directed by Denzel Washington. She is wearing an elegant one shoulder form fitting yellow Michael Kors dress. Looks great up against her skin. 

Love Octavia Spencer's sexy navy Capri pant suit. Chrissy Metz should have taken pointers from her.  As a larger girl I think she should have had Christian Siriano design her a much more flattering look. And navy velvet is an unforgiving material!

9:10 pm: Kristen Bell looks sexy in a very open black Jenny Packham sequin dress, might be a little too much skin. I give credit when men try and change up the tuxedo but Cuba Gooding Jr.'s green plaid suit just looks like a bad kilt. 

Poor Winona Ryder looks like a dog left out in the rain. Frumpy ill fitted black dress. Messy hair and make-up. She doesn't need a stylist.  She needs a shrink. 

9:12 pm: poor Amy Schumer can not walk in those heels. But she looks awesome in that simple low cut black dress.  She's presenting with the legendary Goldie Hawn who hasn't appeared in a movie since 2002. Goldie is wearing a stunning off the shoulder black dress.  I love Goldie, she's hilarious but girlfriend what have you done to your face? What about aging gracefully? Way too much plastic surgery.  The writers have her acting brainless on stage which is annoying.

Hate Kerry Washington's yellow Dolce and Gabbana lace dress. It has a black body suit under it that should have gone the length of the whole dress.  

Ryan Gosling wins best actor in a musical for "La La Land". He looks quite dapper in his white tuxedo jacket. His speech dedicated to his woman, actress Eva Mendes and her support for him during the filming of the movie while she raised their daughter while pregnant with their second and helping her brother with his struggle from cancer is so touching.  He ends his speech by dedicating his award to Eva's brother who lost his battle from the disease. Very moving moment.

9:21 pm: Felicity Jones' pink and nude lace Gucci dress with black ruffle beading is strange but I secretly love it. So different! 

Best screenplay does to "La La Land". 

Love the tuxedo that Evan Rachel Wood showed up in. Hair and make-up are stellar. 

9:24 pm: I'm kind of sick of saying this but "Kristen Wiig, get a damn stylist already!" Enough of these ill fitting, frumpy, ugly laced, ugly prints, ugly colored dresses. If this woman wasn't on the worst dress list every second she'd have no press. I love her, she's hilarious, but her style is no laughing matter. I like her pixie hair cut though.  Her and Steve Carrell's depressing animated movie monologue is great. "Zootopia" wins best animated movie. 

9:30 pm: a dedication in memory of mother and daughter Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds, who died a day apart from each other in December.

Who does Casey Affleck think he is with that ratty hair and beard? Jared Leto? 

"Elle" wins best foreign language film from France.

9:40 pm: Anna Kendrick's gray dress is not flattering at all. It has these tiny little boob cups that look terrible.  Tom Hiddleston wins best actor in a mini series for "The Night Manager".

9:50 pm: Jon Hamm makes a joke about the amount of beards men are sporting tonight. So true. Laura Dern's floral Burberry dress is too maturely. Her kick ass body deserves better.

Natalie Portman really captures Jackie Kennedy's look in this mustard yellow Prada gown. She is very pregnant.

New comer Claire Foy wins best actress in a drama for "The Crown". About young Queen Elizabeth and to be honest it looks like the queen dressed her. This bright, shiny pink sack of a dress does not fit and does nothing for her boobs. Yuck. Better luck next time. 

9:53 pm: "The Crown" wins best drama series.

Lily Collins looks too much "Disney Princess" like in this Zuhair Murad pink dress.

10:00 pm: Meryl Streep wins the Cecil B. Demille for life time achievement in film. No comment on her husband not kissing her when she stands up.  She wears a simple black dress with some heavy looking rhinestones on it that form flowers.  I love that she wore her glasses the whole night.  No jewelry, no nail polish, what a lady!  I knew her speech was going to be political, for she has always been out spoken for gay rights and equal opportunities for women, but really she's Meryl Streep she could go off on any rant. Whether you agree or not you can't  deny her unrelenting talent.  I believe her speech was classic and respectful and elegant, just like her. 

Love Julia Louis-Dreyfus' sleek black and white stripped one shoulder dress. 

10:22 pm: Sienna Miller needs to team up with Kristen Wiig with a hunt for a stylist. White midriff belly Michael Kors dress, pearls, messy up do for the Golden Globes? Get some class. And Zoe Saldana's pink and red dress was already done by Taylor Swift. It still doesn't look good. 

Oh one more to add to the "needs a stylist" list. Jessica Biel! Horribly ugly black and white Elie Saab dress. It's sad when your husband ( Justin Timberlake) has better style than you. 

"La La Land" wins best director. Damien Chazelle won earlier tonight for best screenplay.

10:25 pm: Mandi Moore looks amazing in the low cut navy flowing Naeem Khan dress, love the nod to the 1960's hair do. Just perfect, head to toe.  Donald Glover wins best actor in a comedy series.  He won earlier tonight for best comedy series. 

10:33 pm: Emma Stone wins best actress in a musical for "La La Land".

10:41 pm: Brad Pitt comes out on stage still looking handsome, maybe a bit skinny, despite the drama going on with his very public divorce. 

Jessica Chastain always looks great in her signature blue but I prefer her beautiful red hair down. 

Uuugg Sarah Jessica Parker in this tent of a white Vera Wang dress. And her hair do looks like a nod to the deceased Princess Leia.  

10:45 pm: "La La Land" wins best musical 

Oh heavens, Anna Chlumsky join the list! That green dress. Aaahhhh

10:50 pm: Brie Larson looks stunning in a beautifully fitted red dress, fits her hips like scotch tape. Va va voom.   Homeless looking Casey Affleck wins best actor in a drama for "Manchester by the Sea". Either he's extremely nervous or stoned.

10:57 pm: Handsome Leonardo DiCaprio presents French actress Isabelle Huppert with the award for best actress in a drama for "Elle".  She wears a beautiful Aqua marine studded dress.

11:01 pm: Sylvester Stallone looks like an over cooked ham. Best drama film winner is "Moonlight ". 

That's a wrap!

Best dressed: Mandi Moore 
Worst dressed: Nicole Kidman 

A Joan Ranger for life!
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